I’m writing this around 11pm on Christmas. I’m sick as a dog with a respiratory thing so I wasn’t able to go out with my partner to her parents house for the holiday stuff this year. Pretty bummed out about it!

I got the spider from my stepdaughter (!) and my partner got me a refurbished Apple Watch and some Air Pods. Super fucking thoughtful gifts from everyone. I thought we were just doing little things this year and not making a big fuss but man they really blew me out of the water.

This is cheesy but the biggest gift I got out of all of this was feeling loved.

I don’t know why it took so long for it to hit me, but we’ve grown so much together over the years. When we met a little over six years ago, we were both spending most nights out at the bar getting shitfaced and going home to our terrible apartment in the hood with obnoxious room mates. Now we’re living in a nice little neighborhood in a three bedroom house of our own and the fucking cats even have their own room. This is the first Christmas we’ve had over here.

Life gets so busy you don’t really feel anything changing until you’ve already been there for a while. I feel like Adam Sandler coming to in Click. I feel like I just got hit with the goddamn ghosts of Christmas.

I try so hard to act like all of this is just dumb capitalist bullshit; I’ve never been big for celebrating holidays or exchanging gifts but it’s a downright emotional experience exchanging thoughtful things with people you love.

Even though I’m coughing my lungs out and missed out on a lot this year, this has been the best Xmas I’ve had in a long time.

Not sure if I’ll post this tonight or tomorrow but I hope everyone’s doing good out there <3